I’ve worked on this post for a solid two months now, adding a few words, deleting, trying to say things just right, etc. I feel that this is so important for my husband to read, my friends and family to understand, and for other girls to be with the guy they truly deserve.
Thank you for saving me. Thank you for loving me and making me have the most confidence I have ever had in my entire life. Thank you for being the man I never knew existed. I didn’t truly realize this until we were in the car late at night talking. I was chattering away, something that you love about me even though I don’t understand, and I stopped and thought out loud. “You know, I never have been this talkative. I know you probably don’t believe me but in the past I really never talked”. You told me you understood and it was because my past relationships never let me have that voice. I just could not agree more!
I know my past relationships had been with terrible boys, but I never realized till then how much they chipped away at my self-worth. I would never feel confident enough to babble on and on, because in those relationships I had no voice let alone the confidence to share my opinions. When I think back to those times, I think what the heck was I thinking being with boys like that? While I had relationships all through high school, they never allowed me to grow as a person and find myself. They were all about me standing there and being the girl they wanted me to be. I guess when you are in a relationship like that you don’t know how damaging it is to your personal self, until you find someone who shows you. Thank you for being that person to build me back up again.
Now don’t even get me started about how much you’ve strengthened my faith. Not only did you introduce me to learning so much more about our savior, but you made me realize how important religion is in a relationship. In my past, I dated an atheist who only pulled me away from God and belittled my beliefs. Heck, I even dated a pastor’s son and even then we’d go to church, then go home. Before you, I never lived everyday working towards being better and closer to our Lord! My relationships in the past were always lacking the deeper conversations, the enlightenment, the importance of our savior and why we are even here.
James, thank you for always allowing me to be myself and never pressuring me. I am finally in a relationship where I don’t have to hold my breath and can stand up for myself when needed. I guess it may just be a normal high school boy thing to try and pressure girls into doing things they definitely aren’t ready for. This is more for the other girls reading this, but do not ever let a guy use you. Whether that be for you to be his girlfriend because he wants to say he has one, a guy breaking up with you because you will not give up your purity and innocence for him, or a guy just using you for his own personal gain in some way. Because after going through that and then meeting James, I didn’t realize how much some guys just want to take and take without even thinking about how you feel.
Jim, I know you are probably shaking your head thinking that you didn’t do anything special or out of your way to treat me so great. But, that’s the best thing about you! You are just such a naturally caring and loving man and your actions are so genuine. I remember telling you that when we first started dating, that you were such a down to earth person and you didn’t know what that meant, which made me fall in love with you more. You just have such a special light in you, and I feel your love for me each and every day. Thank you for building me up so much, when others agenda was to just tear me down. Jimmy, thank you for being my husband.